Did you call for an Ambulance?

I thoroughly believe that its healthy to have a bit of a bitch and a moan once in a while – especially in your workplace.  So long as your work is not effected you should be able to off-load your stresses however you see fit.  In our job, most of the this ‘off-loading’ happens in the mess room and has been long accepted.  But, with ambulance crews spending more and more time away from station this is becoming less and less of an occurrence.

So, we do our bitching and moaning on the road.  There’s a theory somewhere that a unit or body of people will always end up uniting against a common cause.  In the workplace this inevitably ends up being ‘The Boss’.  Its not their fault – and most of time they’re innocent of all witch hunt charges placed against them by the mob.  But, in order for a unit or body of people to work effectively, they need a common cause to fight against.  So, ‘The Boss’ it is . . . I consider it a necessary metaphorical sacrifice.

A student paramenace friend of mine, Mick*, told me of a funny dispatch/Control scenario the other day . . . 

As usual, the Service was busy – really busy!  The job had come down as “Male, U/K age, U/K problem – called from public phone box, caller cut off”.  The job was over two hours old so, needless to say Mick called up Control to check on it.

Mick:            Hi RedBase, regarding this CAD, you still want us to go on it?  Its 2 hours old.
Control:       G802*, hi yes please
Mick:            I notice it was called from a phone box.  You think they’ll still be there?
Control:       G802, yes sorry but we still need you to go by and check for us, thanks guys.

Upon arriving the crew unsurprisingly found no patient waiting at the phone box.  A quick check of the area confirmed that there was no one anywhere waiting for an ambulance.  Mick got back on the radio.

Mick:            Hiya RedBase, we’re at the phone box and have done a sweep of the area, there’s no one here requiring an ambulance.
Control:       G802, thanks.  If you can stand by for me I’ll give them a call back
Mick:            . . . sorry?  RedBase, we’re at the phone box.  Its empty.  There’s no one here.
Control:       G802, roger that.  But we still need to give the patient a call back.  Stand by.
Mick:            erm . . . ok . . . standing by

Within seconds, the phone box started to ring.  The Ambulance crew looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders.  Mick picked up the phone and put it to his ear.

Mick:            Hello?
Hello.  This is the London Ambulance Service here.  Did you call for an Ambulance?
Mick:            . . . No.  This is G802 RedBase.  There is no patient.  I’ve just told you that.  I’ve just been talking with you on the handset.  There’s no one here but us.
Control:       G802.  Oh, ok, roger that.  We have to check . . . I’ll erm . . . send you down a cancellation when you’re ready.  Thanks.

Some might argue that this sort of thing happens all the time.  I’d like to think it doesn’t.  But, I reckon we can all pick at least one occasion when something as equally nonsensical  as this has happened to them.

On a positive note however, I’d like to think at least on this occasion, another life was saved!  Cue sunset and cue exit music – ‘In the City’ by the Eagles.


*Not their real name/call sign of course