This is from a good friend of mine who works as a paramenace way down in the South West . . . a guest blog/poem if you like.  Binder

‘Twas the night before Christmas when all through the night,
The sirens they sounded, “it’s a twat in plight”!
They jumped off the bridges, they puked in the truck,
They swore and they dribbled and who gave a . . . fuck.

Well the crews of the ambo, for all they are worth,
Peeled them up off the deck and chuckled with mirth.
Leaving half eaten Donars, they dashed like a comet
To help the poor souls all covered in vomit.

To hospital doors we bring them and listen,
To the groans of the nurses, while doctors admit them
Remember this night, that the ill and the lame,
Are far more deserving and A&E’s game.

Anon